Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
