Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
