I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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