your room smells of hookers.
And success
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Randomize
