I don't usually arrange sex via text message
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
