i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
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