so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
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