Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
