Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
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