Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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