Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Randomize
