i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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