The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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