I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
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