So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Randomize
