Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
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