I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
how do flat chested girls get laid?
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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