He asked to "fluff my boner.."
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Randomize
