Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Randomize