I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Randomize
