So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize