Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
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