Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
