Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize