my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
Randomize