Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize