Christians are straight up FREAKS
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
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