she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
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