I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
