Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize
