I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
