last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Randomize