i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
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