He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
