I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
My feet surprised me
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