Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
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