I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Randomize
