school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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