I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize
