Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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