I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
