i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Randomize
