Don't you send me to vm
I think I died a long time ago.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
Randomize