His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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