I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
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