Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Randomize
