when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
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