We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize