We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
