i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Randomize